Just Like Me

Yesterday I had a regularly scheduled meeting with a student at the Moody Bible Institute who is studying Audio Engineering. I am serving as advisor for his senior capstone project which is an original progressive metal album. He is a really talented and sincere young man and it's been a pleasure to walk with him through the last couple of stages of this project. The project will be finished up in December and I'm excited to be just a small part of his journey.

Following our meeting yesterday, we started talking about different bands that we are currently listening to. I am at the Outer Banks this week and drove down yesterday. For some reason, I decided to revisit the catalog of The Sweet Comfort Band, a Christian act from the early 1980s I really listened to quite a bit. Their music and lyrics had a huge impact on my musicianship and perspectives at that time. While driving to the Outer Banks from Durham, I listened to a number of their songs on shuffle and it was a good reminder of how much I like their music. So, as part if our conversation, I mentioned the band. He, in turn, suggested that I check out Wilderun, a progressive symphonic metal band with roots at Berkeley College of Music. (By the way, I checked them out and really dig their music. It reminds me of a more contemporary version of some of the things that Believer was doing back in the '80s and '90s.) I recommended that he specifically check out the song by The Sweet Comfort Band called Just Like Me. I mentioned that I had proposed to my wife 37 years ago using that song. I think that peaked his interest and he and his wife gave the song to listen this morning on their way to school. So, I figured I would tell you guys in the story of that fateful proposal in today's post. 

Back when I was in high school and college, I spent a lot of time writing and covering pop songs from the piano. I had learned how to do basic chord structures on the piano and would accompany myself singing these songs that meant something to me. This song, Just Like Me became a staple of my repertoire. I could always count on it to impress folks in a impromptu musical jam session.  Some of my other favorities were Always a Woman by Billy Joel, Come Sail Away by Styx, Fire and Rain by James Taylor, and others. You get the idea.

Sweet Comfort Band was an American Christian rock band formed in Riverside, California, active from 1973 to 1984, known for pioneering a jazzy, funky R&B rock sound in Christian music.  They were also known for detailed airbrushed album covers by Kerne Erickson and a logo designed by Rick Griffin. I can't say for sure, but I may have originally picked up one of their albums because I thought the album art was cool. In the end, the music was formative.

Coincidentally, the song in this story chronicles a touring musician expressing his love for his girlfriend in really profound and beautiful ways. The last line of the song is "And maybe you could marry someone just like me." Of course, whenever I performed the song I never used that actual line of the lyrics. I would substitute something much less committal in its place.  Faithfully, by Journey was another similar song of the era.

By 1989, Barbra and I had been together for about 4 years and we were both ready to take our relationship to the next level. We had many discussions about the possibility of getting married and it was clear that we were both of the same mindset. I made a special trip to Pittsburgh ask her parents blessing and then ran over to my hometown of Indiana, PA to pick up the ring I had bought at Luxenberg's Jewelers and to tell my parents of my plan. Now, back in 1989 the elaborate proposals that we see today had not yet come into vogue. But, I knew that I wanted to do something special that we would remember for the rest of our lives.  Obviously,  music was a centerpiece of our lives and we spent a lot of time together in musical settings. Also, she had endured many hours of me playing guitar and singing "at her" as they hilariously said in the Barbie movie.

As I had been trying to decide how to propose, I landed on going to a state park and proposing while we were hanging out at a campfire, one of our favority activities. Lake Codorus State Park was very close to York PA where she lived at the time.  I don't really remember all of the details of the day. I am sure we packed a great picnic lunch and hung out of the lake all day.  (We are still doing this when we have a free day in 2026, 36 years later.) As the day was winding down I built a campfire. I remember being super nervous. I had the ring in my pocket all day long. At some point, out came the guitar. Of course I had to warm up the audience. I had been playing several of our favorite songs and keeping things very casual and conversational throughout the late afternoon. Finally the time had come. I played Just Like Me and ended with the actual lyric of "And maybe you could marry someone just like me." I got down on one knee and pulled out the ring. The ring was barely on her finger before her arms grabbed me around the neck and she practically knocked me to the ground. I remember that as being one of the most joyful and celebratory moments of my life. I knew at that moment the answer was yes! Over the next hour or more, we talked about our plans and excitedly envisioned what our lives together would look like. Of course, this was before cell phones. We jumped in the car and went to the park office to call our parents and let them know. Then, I recall going back to York and celebrating with Barbra's roommate and her boyfriend who was and still is one of my very best friends to this day. Honestly, it was perfect. It ended up being the 2nd song we danced to at our wedding in March of 1990. (If you are interested, Always by Atlantic Star was first and Just the Way You Are by Billy Joel was 3rd.)

The Sweet Comfort Band has played a really important role in my life. I believe that their musical sensibilities were absolutely formative to mine and that continues even today. And, this song continues to be one of the sweetest love songs that I could imagine. I have continued to perform it on a semi-regular basis throughout my life. Anytime Barbra is in the room when I play it, she and I share a knowing glance. It was really fun to go back and listen to their catalog again this week. I think their music will find its way into my regular rotation.

Peace.

Scott